Do You Do Facebook Quizzes?

I've done a lot of them, and, generally, they're not too hard. After all, their purpose is not to stump you or make you feel dumb but to keep you scrolling and answering (guessing) so that you can see more ads and coupons than you can find in the Sunday papers--even now, when those papers are much diminished.

I've done quizzes about movie stars, U. S. geography, American and world history, the 60s (the decade, not my age, which I barely remember), Shakespeare, and on and on.

My technique is simple: I keep going until I miss one. Then I say a bad word (or ten) and close it down. If I get them all correct, I sometimes share the results on Facebook with some mildly self-deprecating comment--like: Some lucky guesses! But, of course, what I'm really doing is the equivalent of showing Mommy only my good homework and quiz and test papers (of which, in my boyhood, there were not all that many).

In fact, I don't even take quizzes that look too ... daunting (i.e., I don't know much about the subject). And I am normally not lured in by a Facebook favorite: Only 5% of Americans Can Pass This Test! (See pic at the top of the page.) It's the equivalent of those Facebook memes and stories that feature, atop, something like this: Most people won't share (or like) this. Let's see who does! This, of course, is similar to those playground dares that used to get me in trouble at Adams Elementary School. No one here would throw a snowball at the teacher! (Oh, yeah?!!?)

Okay, what got me off on this today was ... a Facebook test on grammar. I'm going to take it right now and tell you what happened ... [PAUSE] ...

Well, I got 20/20 ... but there were some interesting questions, some of which contained errors in conventional usage, by the way.

• At the top of the quiz: Would the grammar police arrest you?
• The questions dealt with the confusion of homophones (there-they're-their), pronoun case (I, me), usage and spelling (fewer, less; farther, further; then, than; alot, a lot)
• One question, though, begins with this: Your girlfriend looks like she's put on a lot of weight ... But because the like is followed by a clause (subj + v), you must use as if or as though instead--like is not a subordinating conjunction and cannot be used to initiate a dependent clause like this one).
• Another: The possible answers all included alright, a spelling that is not yet standard, I don't think. All right belongs.
• Another "right" answer started with this: I know someone who's looking for their bike .... Usage is changing here, but because someone is singular, you need a singular pronoun before bike--a pronoun like his or her or his or her. If you know the person involved, use the gender: I know a young woman ... I know a guy ... Whatever.

But ... I got my score ... I shared it on FB. Nice to know I'm a ... model.

Congratulations, you’re a model grammar citizen.

You got 20 out of 20 correct.