Weekly Doggerel: May 15-17

When I was on Facebook (I recently departed a few days, then returned), I liked to post what I called "Daily Doggerel"--silly poems about quotidian events in my life. I also posted lines about the word-of-the-day (from my tear-off calendar) and yet another couplet about the plays of Shakespeare. I was working my way through them all, writing a daily couplet about events in the scenes and acts; it took me as many as fifty days to get through a single play. I was nearing the end of Romeo & Juliet when I closed my FB account (which I reopened last night--Saturday).

But even while I was "off" FB, I found I was still writing the dumb things, so I thought I'd just save them all up till Sundays and post them as "Weekly Doggerel." This first week has only Thursday-Saturday, so that is how we'll start. And end. I'm back to the Old Daily Way ...

Daily Doggerel

Thursday, May 15

Jaws

My jaw’s in pain—can’t open wide—

It’s too much of a feat—

And mealtimes I am dreading, for

It hurts too much to eat.

I cut my food in mouse-sized bites

And chew so tenderly.

Oh, friends and foes, the time has come

To pity Poor Old Me.

Friday, May 16

Jaws 2

A muscle pulled, the dentist said—

Back there along my jaw.

And so it is that I now have

An unimpressive maw.

I'll lose respect of animals—

Mosquito to giraffe—

And if he saw me swimming near,

Old Jaws would surely laugh.

Of course, he'd laugh for just a bit,

And then—a shark attack.

And I would flail (to no avail)

While Jaws enjoyed his snack.


Saturday, May 17

Jaws 3

The Ibuprofen fails to bring

The pain relief I crave,

And so I start to think about

A dive into a wave.

An ocean splash could soothe my jaw—

Or so I think (in pain).

But sharks just love the splashing sound—

And Jaws will feed again.

Vocab Doggerel

Thursday, May 15

You know we really can’t condone

Your leaving babies home alone.

Before you leave, it’s requisite

To find someone to babysit.

Friday, May 16

I know it’s pointless—even dumb.

But there are times I just succumb.


Saturday, May 17

1. Dumb …

All the meal was so delicious—

But the server? Too officious.

2. … and Dumber

At the ocean, fishing daily.

Salmon so delicious.

But the tuna, oh, so jealous,

Cried aloud: “Oh, fish us!”

Shakespeare Couplets

Thursday, May 15

The Friar rushes off to Juliet

While fearing all his plots will soon beget. (5.2)

Friday, May 16

Now Romeo arrives—his lover’s tomb.

And over all—the ambiance of doom. (5.3)


Saturday, May 17

So Paris, strewing flowers, does not see

That’s Romeo’s arrived—in misery. (5.3)